Analysing Kamala Dass' "My Mother at Sixty-six

Theme

The poem, My Mother at Sixty-six explores the theme of ageing, bereavement and loss. In this poem, the narrator who is travelling to another city, probably another country is suddenly struck by the thought that she might be seeing her mother for the last time. 

Kamala Dass explores the fragility of human relationships that are limited by time and the process of ageing. Bereavement is a childhood fear that all humans harbour. No one imagines that one would lose one's dearest one to old age. We take the presence of our dearest ones for granted. 

Message

The message delivered in the poem is that ageing and bereavement are inevitable. The loss of our dear ones is inevitable and a natural process. life and death are universal; although one's grief is painful, it is, however, personal and that the world moves on in spite of our grief!

Style of Writing

The whole poem is written as a single sentence. A single thread of thought is contained in the poem, (the thought of losing her mother) and this thought is interspersed with observations of the real world around the narrator ( trees sprinting, children spilling airport's security check). It is rather like a stream of consciousness where the narrator keeps drifting from deep inner thoughts to the world outside. It is as if to suggest that one needs to see the bigger picture - although one's grief is painful, it is, however, personal and that the world moves on in spite of our grief!

Figures of Speech

1. The poem abounds with similes throughout. A few of the examples are listed below:

  a) Simile 

     i.  "Her face ashen like that of a corpse"- her mother's pale face is compared to that of a corpse.

     ii. "Wan, pale as a late winter's moon"- the mother's appearance is compared to that of the moon.

  b) Contrast

     i) "Trees sprinting, the merry children spilling"- energy and youth as contrasted with old age.

  c) Repetition

      "All I did was smile and smile and smile"- the repetition of the word "smile" brings out the
         artificiality of the expression meant to reassure her mother that they will meet again.

  d) Irony

      "See you soon Amma"- this is ironical as the narrator is not very sure about seeing her mother
        when she returns from her journey abroad.

  e) Metaphors and symbols

      i) winter's moon - end of life cycle, old age weakness
      ii) merry children - dynamism, youth, energy
      iii) trees sprinting - relativity, movement as opposed to stillness

Reference to context questions and their answers:

I. Lines 1-6 "Driving...with"

  

   a) Where was she driving to?

        She was driving to the Cochin Airport in a car.

   b) Who was she driving with?

         She was with her mother who was rather elderly.

  c)  Identify the figure of speech in lines 5-6 and explain why and how it has been used.

         The figure of speech is the simile. Her mother's appearance has been compared to that of a  
         corpse.

 d)  What did she "realise with pain"?

         She realised with pain and grief that her mother had grown old and that she might lose her.



II. Lines 9-18  "that she...felt that"

    a) What "thought" did she put away?

        She put away the thought that she might lose her mother.

    b) Why did she look away from her mother?


        The thought of losing her mother was too painful and distressing. She wanted to divert her sad 
        thoughts by looking out of the window. 

    c) What did she see from the car windows? How did the scene contrast with that of her mother?

        She saw trees that seemed to be sprinting and children who were running out of their homes, 
         probably going to school.

    d) How did her mother appear in line 16?

         She looked pale, lifeless and weak.

     e) What figure of speech has the poet used in lines 17 and 18? Why?


          The poet has used a simile to compare the weak, pale and lifeless appearance of the mother to 
          that of the late winters moon. Both the moon and the mother look pale and weak. They are 
          nearing the end of their life-cycle.

III. Lines 19-24 "old familiar...smile..."


       a) What was her "familiar ache? my childhood's fear"?

             The fear of ageing, the fear of losing her mother, the fear of bereavement. 

       b) Why did she say, "see you soon Amma?" Did she really believe she would?

            She wanted to reassure her mother that they would get to see each other when she returned.
            The narrator was not very sure that this would be. But then she didn't want to distress her 
            mother into thinking that she was going away leaving her mother to die!

       c) Identify the figure of speech used in lines 23-24. Why has the poet used this figure of speech?

            Poet has used repetition to lay stress on the word smile. This is intentional. She wants to 
            highlight the artificiality of the smile.

       d) How does the statement, "see you soon, Amma" contrast with the "childhood fear of the
           narrator?

 
          She was afraid that since her mother was already frail and rather sickly, she would probably 
          not get see her when she returned. However she did not want to distress her mother with her 
         own apprehehension. Thus to reassure her mother and, perhaps to assuage her own sense of 
         guilt she kept smiling.